Tag Archives: Listening

On The Cusp

Summer is officially coming to an end tonight. I let the fact sink in and notice a little bit of sadness. Somehow this summer was very precious because it was so different. It not only gave my body time to recover but also allowed grief that was still in my heart to finally move through and made it so clear what changes still needed to be made.

There are dishes in the sink waiting to be washed but just for this moment I pause and remember. It feels important to acknowledge the changing of the season and express appreciation and gratitude for the many gifts of this summer: the opportunity to rest and be still, the quiet solitude, the fruits, veggies and the flowers from the garden, witnessing the sun rise, just breathing, deeply taking in the smells, the sounds, the shooting stars, the colours and the unique beauty of summer. Nature took care of me and taught me how to take care of myself by following my own rhythm and to listen.

Photo by Michelle Venne

Today squirrel knocked on my window – literally! It had never done this before even though we had a few discussions about throwing pinecones at me when I am walking beneath the large pine or digging holes in the middle of the path to my cabin.

Hearing the strange knock on the window this afternoon I drew back the curtain just in time to watch something leap off the windowsill onto the deck. I expected it to be a bird and was surprised to see the squirrel instead. Once it had my full attention it talked quite excitedly while moving along the edge of the deck, stopping every few steps as if it wanted to show me something important.

I thought I had learned to listen. Yet when the squirrel asked me to follow it today, I chose not to go. Reflecting back on it now I see that none of the reasons for not going were good enough to miss taking in the fullness of this last day of summer and receiving whatever the squirrel was trying to show me. I wonder now what I may have missed…

One late evening this summer as it was getting dark I got the clear instructions to go down to the water. I was feeling very tired, but I hiked down to the ocean anyways and I am so glad I did. It was profound to get such detailed information where to stand, how to connect with a whale who was resting in the distance through sending messages from my heart to his, breathing together and then having to hurry all of sudden to a certain outcrop of rocks which was not easy to do in the dark. I found myself standing at the edge of the water just in time to witness a pod of dolphins swimming by lit up by the bioluminescence in the water. I will never forget the sound they made nor the magic of seeing them gracefully gliding through the water like fiery arrows with sparkling light everywhere. It felt like the sound and light was moving right through me. In that moment it was so clear that there is no limitations of what we can manifest.

So glad I decided to leave the dishes for now and dig a little deeper. I had completely forgotten about the incident with the squirrel until I stood out on the deck after dinner tonight enjoying the feel of the rain on my face and feeling my socks grow heavy from the moisture.

Feeling grateful and excited about welcoming in the new season I intend to apologize to the squirrel in the morning for not listening and following its invitation. Still I keep on learning…

Gentle Equinox Blessings to you!

The Eye Of The Storm

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Rain is on the way. The calm smooth water and early morning birdsong have been replaced by strong ripples on the water and trees swaying this way and that way. The wind is singing a different kind of tune, one that feels urgent and forceful. The low grey clouds are moving in fast, darkening the sky with their arrival, while raptors high in sky are circling on strong currents. They are so far up, it is not possible for me to tell anymore if they are eagles or vultures. As I watch their effortless flight I wonder what they can see…

Sitting inside with a freshly brewed cup of nettle, oat straw and lady’s mantle tea I listen to the fire crackle in the wood stove and the wind’s changing song. I feel the exhaustion in my body, telling me it’s need for rest and nurturing. I am so glad I took time to carefully choose the herbs for the tea. The response to the warm liquid is a big “Yes” and “Thank you” from my body.

Ah, here it is! The drops of rain are rapidly falling on the roof and skylights, adding their own rhythm to the day. Frodo, my dear old deaf dog, is lying quietly by my side not hearing any of it. I miss our long walks in all kinds of weather. DW-Elke&Frodo P1120504We had so many adventures together: climbing hills, discovering new paths in the forests and valleys, checking out stormy seas while walking on beaches with the wind almost knocking us over. There was always this sense of being connected, even though we were exploring our world in different ways. I often wondered what Frodo was discovering when he sniffed something that had called to him from some distance. He would give it all his attention for a long period of time while I was gazing at the beautiful vista before me or taking a closer look at something I found on the path. I often joked that he must be reading a whole book before he finally moved on to the next smell. Now we only venture out together so he can do his business before he turns immediately back to the safety of home. Food and comfort are now his greatest joy.

Thunder unexpectedly adds it’s bass voice as the wind increases noticeably, bringing the chimes to life. Their higher pitch is startling and really stands out as the storm’s hum increases and decreases in unpredictable patterns.

Life has been rather unpredictable lately. While writing this I recognize that life is ever changing like this storm, even though there have been many periods in my life P1080769that have felt more steady with a certain pattern. Perhaps I have forgotten the challenges each day presented then. Looking into the eye of the storm I see that my exhaustion stems from trying to control what is going on in my life and work, and having expectations of myself that I cannot possibly meet in this endless sea of change.

Gratitude for the wind arises in me as it is making me pay close attention. It’s loud voice cannot be ignored. Listening I once again remember the key is to “trust life”, whatever it brings and that I will never figure it all out or get it all done.

For now the idea of rest sounds lovely indeed. I will give myself this gift of comforting tea and warm fire as I watch the beauty of the storm unfold without me having to do anything. My books and journal like faithful friends lying by my side just like Frodo and the joy of writing filling my heart once again.