I am breathing in the beauty of this morning, breathing out any held tension in my body and mind. I love when I start the day in this way without a big agenda, even though there are many things to do. I surrender to the mystery of life knowing it will take me where I need to be and help me get done, what needs to get done today. I seem to have lost both the energy and the drive to try to control life, push through, or go against the flow.
The beauty of having a canine companion is that he makes me go outside and partake in the wonder of life outdoors. And there is something so beautiful about walking through the trees glistening with raindrops in the morning light breathing in the fresh air.
As I walked earlier today I reflected on all the changes that are happening in my body and life right now at the age of 50 in what I call the menopausal or emerging crone phase. There is a mystery to be embraced here of leaving one phase for another like leaving childhood into womanhood or the time of becoming a mother.
I remember myself being pregnant with my first child, wondering what it would be like to be a Mother and what it meant, knowing that life for me was about to change forever. I also remember the young girl struggling through puberty wondering what it would be like to become a woman. Now I wonder once again what it will be like to become a crone and what that means for me. It is a personal journey, that is asking me to go back to the beginning, way back and open to whatever is unfolding in me and before me.